My Deeply Superficial Thoughts

I am Hot Pants McGee, and I have interesting things to say.

The Secret Service Agent January 31, 2012

Filed under: Dating — TeritaBonita @ 1:10 pm
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As a rule in dating in a post-Google world, one should always namecheck the potential suitor.  You can get some effing crazies, you know?  I mean, if I have a date with Tom Smith, you can be damned sure that I am in front of my computer WAY before I am alone with Mr. Smith, using my amazingly creepy internet stalking abilities to find out exactly what homedude has been up on the interwebs.  I will know if he is a creeper or into cosplay or a Juggalo in a matter of minutes, thus saving me from a bad date or murder.

This search also serves a positive purpose, and not just a creeper one.  In googling the dude/lady, you are able to delve into their online presence and possibly discover common interests and mutual friends that you didn’t know existed.  The tricky part is introducing it into conversation without sounding like a complete fucking psycho-stalker.   Which brings me to another circus act that I recently endured…

I met this dude at a party with some girlfriends a few weeks ago, and he asked for my number.  He seemed like a cool dude, and while I wasn’t interested in him romantically,  he seemed like he might make a fun friend/drinking buddy, so I gave it to him.    He commences a text conversation with me over the next few days,  no big deal, but every time I ask his last name, he dodges the question.   This gives me a super red flag, and me and my ladies commence a serious search for this dude with no last name, to no avail.   He wanted to hang out this past weekend, and when I asked him his last name again (totally casually)  he stopped texting and calling me.  I have decided he is either on a classified mission with the CIA or is a ninja.  The world may never know.


Practicing my Nun-chucks,

Terita Bonita


Weekend Jam 1.27.12 January 27, 2012

Filed under: Uncategorized — TeritaBonita @ 4:32 pm


I can see what’s coming, but I’m not saying it…



Adventures in Dating Hell

Filed under: Uncategorized — TeritaBonita @ 3:44 pm
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Yes, yes… I haven’t blogged in forever, I know.  I’ve kinda been a busy bee!  Enough of the apologies, though, as I am BACK and I am going to share with you the bizarre dating events that have occurred…

After a particularly emotional setback, I have branched back out into dating, and man, let me tell you…  its pretty damn insane. Fair warning: I have a tendency to be a tad eclectic and attracted to others of that persuasion, which may lead to slightly more bizarre interactions than that of the average single lady.  Regardless, I have been told a ridiculous number of times lately that I need to share these stories with the world, so I shall…


Here is a snippet from this week.  Literally THIS WEEK.  I can’t make this shit up.  


So, after an infuriating and finally successful hunt, I manage to get this painting that I have been eyeing for months into my humble abode.  




I ask MK to come over and hang it up, seeing as he is an artist and whatnot, I figured he would be the guy to do it right.  Now, there is a short, but nutso history with me and MK.  Brief fling-type thing over a year ago, and now we are friends.  So, anyway, he comes over, we have some wine and make fun of my accidently-purchased slutty platform shoes… blah blah.  

He then looks at me and says, “You are the smartest girl I know.  If you could just lose 35 pounds, I would make you my 4th wife.”